Thursday, January 30, 2014

I May Be The Biggest Dork You Know

Pick your favorite...

By Kevin Hunsperger
@kevinhunsperger & @my123cents on Twitter

When I was a kid, I thought I was much cooler than I ever was.  I was in dork denial.  I'm not sure when I finally came to terms with this fact, but it's made adulthood much easier.

My obsession with wrestling is one of the things that factor into my dorkiness now.  You probably know by now that besides my family, wrestling is the thing I'm most passionate about in life.  It's the inspiration for this blog in the first place.

Every year my buddy Chad and I go to Wrestlemania, which is the Super Bowl of wrestling.  It's held in a different city each year and without fail, we dress up like a wrestler, manager, or announcer from the past.  I've been everyone from Vince McMahon himself to "The Million Dollar Man" Ted DiBiase to Hulk Hogan.  While we've been photographed and videotaped by countless other wrestling fans in attendance, I have no doubt many more have made jokes about us.  We've come to accept that.  It comes with the territory and honestly, we have a good time doing.

Outside of wrestling events, I've donned some pretty ridiculous costumes in my community.  I'm not even talking about Halloween.  Each time though, it's been for a good cause.  I recently was asked to be a member of the Village People for a fundraiser for Hospice of Southern Illinois.  I was given the biker role, and luckily the kind folks at Black Diamond Harley Davidson loaned me more than $300 worth of leather for the night.  As uncomfortable as I was dancing, I had a fantastic time and of course I wasn't the only one in costume, which made things easier.

Do Your Best Man
When I was the Cub Master of the local Cub Scout Pack, I had a couple different characters I dressed up as to help make the monthly Pack Meetings more fun.  Do Your Best Man was an obscure superhero who visited our meeting one night.  He didn't have a cape, but he did sport a mask to protect his identity.  The boys seemed to enjoy that night and had a good laugh at my, I mean DYBM's expense.

Prof. Scoutenstein 
Another meeting the boys got to meet Professor Scoutenstein.  He brought a Cub Scout Time Machine to the meeting and helped the scouts step into the future to their next rank in the pack.  The Professor was a close friend to Professor Wrestlestein who had earlier that year competed for a chance to manage TNA Knockout Velvet Sky.  Although Wrestlestein couldn't make it, so I stepped in to do the job.

When I made Chicken a la Jericho for the 100 Men Who Cook fundraiser, I sported my fake muscles, blond wig, and apron and did my best to be Y2J himself.  I don't know how many people at the event got who I was supposed to be, but it was fun anyway.

Don't have a cow, man
The Polar Plunge for Special Olympics, I've been Bleeker from Juno, Harry Potter, and a cow complete with utters.  My dressing up in crazy costumes goes back to my college days.  For some reason, I would from time to time put on that cow costume and attend fraternity meetings.  Since we were required to wear a tie, I would be sure have one on.  It wasn't hard matching a tie with the black and white cowhide.

Under the Sea...
One other moment that lives in infamy on Facebook is from the Alpha Xi Delta Rose Pageant.  I was selected by my fraternity brothers to represent Sigma Nu in this drag queen pageant.  There are no photos (at least that I've ever seen) from the actual contest.  But I did dress up like the Little Mermaid for the pre-show contest the night before.  As you can see, I'm wearing a ball of red yarn on my head, a bra with paper seashells over my pecs, and green plastic wrap around my legs to create the tail.  I literally had to hop around because it was impossible to walk.

So there you have it, just a few of my dorkiest moments caught on camera.  Most for a good cause, but all for fun.  Life's too short to take yourself serious all the time.

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