Crushed with fear

Kevin at 15

By Kevin Hunsperger

@kevinhunsperger & @my123cents on Twitter

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Tales of my teenage years and the mild angst I experienced seem to do well here. So here's another story from those days gone by, but hopefully with a lesson wrapped up in it too. I'd like to think my awkwardness will pave the way for some other young person to not follow in my footsteps. 

Picture it, February 1989. I'm a sophomore in high school, a month away from turning 16 and getting my license. I thought having a license and a car would increase my odds at a social life and help me break out of my shell. It did not, but that's not what this story is about.

Back to that night, for some reason, I got dressed up and went to the "Heart Hop" Valentine's dance. I went alone but hung out with friends at the dance as we awkwardly would make our way to the bleachers when a slow song would start to play.

There was a girl there that I had been crushing on for some time, despite not ever once talking to her. We had mutual friends and through the course of the night, one of them informed me that she would dance with me if I asked her. I thought my heart would hop right out of my chest just thinking about asking her to dance. Even though I was given a guaranteed "yes" to my request I was still paralyzed with fear.

Stock photo

Then it happened, Chris De Burgh's Lady in Red started playing. I mustered up the courage and asked my crush to dance. She agreed and we moved onto the dance floor. Now for the awkward part. We didn't talk for the entire 4 minutes and 17 seconds of the song. When it was over I thanked her and we both went our own ways. We didn't speak again until we had a class together our senior year.

My apprehension to follow-up was based on fear and my belief that if she was interested, she would make the next move. I have no idea if she was or wasn't, but the lesson learned here is to not wait for the opportunity to knock. I love this quote from The Rock:

That's the case for EVERY walk of life. Whether you're a teenage boy trying to find the courage to ask out a girl or getting your career jumpstarted. For a long time, I kept waiting for news directors to call me with a job offer. I still sit and wait for WWE to stumble upon my work and call me. I know that's really not going to happen, but I think about it. More realistically I keep telling myself my blogs are going to catch someone's eye and they'll contact me with an amazing freelancing gig. I'm still not breaking out of my shell and pursuing those clients like I should be. 

It's a work in progress some 28 years after that dance in the gymnasium of good ol' Northwest High School. Don't let your fear of the unknown force you out of the game completely.  As Gary Vee once said, "You're better off going 1 for 5 than going 0 for 0." 

A few bursts of inspiration

By Kevin Hunsperger

@kevinhunsperger & @my123cents on Twitter

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I'm not making excuses, but kind of. This week is a crazy one for me as I work on a couple of big projects. But I don't want my brand to suffer as a result, so I've sought out some quotes from people I find inspiring and wanted to share their words with you. I truly believe 2017 will be a banner year for My 1-2-3 Cents. Thank you to everyone who reads, shares and supports all my endeavors.

Hustle!

Courtesy: @GaryVee

By Kevin Hunsperger

@kevinhunsperger & @my123cents on Twitter

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I've been listening to and watching Gary Vaynerchuk (aka Gary Vee) for the past nine or ten months, thanks to my buddy Tom Harness. I've tried to employ some of Gary's tactics and strategies into my daily life as I strive to build the My 1-2-3 Cents brand with blogging, podcasting and vlogging. The last two days the content of Gary's podcast has had a particularly profound effect on me. 

During Episode 239 of the #AskGaryVee Show, he encouraged listeners to check out his Episode 130 of Daily Vee and direct messaging potential contacts on Instagram. I want to build this blog and my freelance blogging business. Right now I only have a few steady clients. In order to take it to the next level, I have to branch out from the people I know and step outside my comfort zone. The worst they can do is say no. Then I move on, right? 

It's weird because there's a definite "fear of failure/success" vibe going on with me. Fear of success? It sounds crazy and I can't really articulate it. But I've become complacent and comfortable with the status quo. That is until today...

The other takeaway from Gary is document your journey. Instagram and Snapchat both have the stories feature. Build an audience by sharing your struggles and successes. The important part is to hustle and grind. Stop playing Words with Friends (very guilty). Stop binge watching Netflix. Stop checking Facebook. Use that time to flip stuff on eBay or Amazon (something I'm SLOWLY trying to do). Send out direct messages. As Gary says "You're better off going 1 for 5 than going 0 for 0. Take chances. We're only here for a certain amount of time. 

"Give value. Give value. Give value. And then ask for business." I'm so motivated, refreshed and pumped. February 1, 2017 is my New Year's Day.

Quit blaming Millennials because you're afraid of the future

Those pesky Millennials...
Courtesy: MediaVenue

By Kevin Hunsperger

@kevinhunsperger & @my123cents on Twitter

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Lately, I've seen a lot of people my age (43) and older complaining about Millennials. Some of the griping is justified, but many in that generation have been labeled as lazy, unmotivated and entitled. It's unfair to paint the entire generation with a broad brushstroke. Because there are just as many Gen Yers, Gen Xers and even Baby Boomers who fall into the same category. 

Gary Vaynerchuck
#AskGaryVee

One big complaint I see and hear a lot is "kids are always on their phone." I'm going to credit Gary Vaynerchuk (Gary Vee) for helping me better articulate my feelings on the people who have a problem with this. The smartphone is quickly becoming what the TV was to us and our parents growing up. As more networks and companies provide streaming services, the days of sitting in front of a big screen mounted to the wall will go away just like VCRs, rotary phones and record players. 

It's the first major shift in technology since the TV hit the scene and listening to the radio as a family changed. My wife and I are "those parents" who let each of our kids (ages 17, 15 and 11) have their own smartphone. But it's a privilege not a right in our house. While they do spend more than a fair share of time watching YouTube videos or playing games, they're also learning how social media works. 

I have no doubt this will help all three of my kids in the future. Our oldest has expressed interest in a career in technology so why deprive him of learning what he can as a junior in high school? 

I was senior in college when the internet and email were first being introduced. I wish now that I would have immersed myself more into it. But I didn't UNDERSTAND what it was all about so I dismissed it, just like many parents and grandparents are doing today. 

Courtesy: The Simpsons

Our lack of understanding and our fear of change has created a society of overreactive, fist wagging, cloud yellers. Our parents probably complained when we spent hours on end in front of the TV on Saturday mornings watching cartoons and eating countless bowls of cereal. Our Music Television was foreign to them. And why would anyone carry around a boom box and listen to music?

Guess what? Their parents and grandparents probably complained because their loved ones were flocking around the picture box in the living room every evening after dinner. And why is that guy with the jet black greasy hair moving his hips like that? 

While I've still got you here, instead of complaining that kids today are texting instead of writing a letter, encourage them to use the technology to their benefit. There is no less sentiment in writing a text as there is in writing a note. It may take me a few minutes longer to write the note, but the feelings and emotions are the same. And in all likelihood, the card or letter is going to end up in your trash can 30 seconds after you've read it. 

Older people get worked up by this because we've always written letters by hand. But remember, it's the evolution of technology. If that's how your kids or grandkids communicate, adapt and embrace it. You don't have to love it or even like it. At the same time, though, it doesn't hurt for kids to take a minute to write grandparents a note or call them. 

The technology isn't going anywhere. We need to embrace it and quit living under the belief that if we don't accept it that the change isn't going to come. And stop expecting the worst out of people. When that happens they usually deliver. People of all generations can be generous, kind and caring. They can also be giant douche tacos. 

I doubt this has changed anyone's mind, but I at least wanted to put it out there and hopefully get a conversation going. Just because things aren't the way they were 30, 40 or 50 years ago doesn't mean they're not good and we're doomed as a society. There's a lot of bright spots out there, so let's feed and nurture those instead of piss and moan about what we don't like or understand. 

What I love about Fridays

By Kevin Hunsperger

@kevinhunsperger & @my123cents on Twitter

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"It's Friday, Friday gonna get down on Friday." -- Rebecca Black
"Last Friday night, yeah I think we broke the law." -- Katy Perry
"Everybody's working for the weekend." -- Loverboy

I'm trying to incorporate a new line of thinking that I shouldn't look forward to Friday solely based on the fact that it marks the end of the work week. It's a mantra Gary Vee has adopted. But when you get up at 1:25 a.m., it's hard not to look forward to two days of sleeping in each week. That's just one of the reasons I like Friday though. There are a few others that top my list.

Craft Beer Friday

My buddy Tom Harness started Craft Beer Friday at his company Harness Digital Marketing a few years ago. Since he's moved his office to downtown Carterville, I've headed over nearly every week for some brew and conversation. It also gives us a chance to record an episode of The Craftbeericans from time to time. 

Good times at The Annex (RIP)

Many years ago the News 3 This Morning crew started going out for breakfast on Fridays. The Breakfast Club leaves work after the last GMA cut in is over.It's a tradition that has stood the test of time starting with Subway and evolving to countless other restaurants in the Marion-Herrin-Carterville-Carbondale area. 

Napping. If there's one day of the week I'm certain to get a nap it's on Friday. I usually try to do that in case we go out that night or have a football game, band performance or cheer event to attend.

Something to Wrestle with Bruce Prichard is my favorite podcast. A new show drops each Friday. I look forward to 11 a.m. each week and plan my longer runs for Fridays just because of that show. 

Ultimate Warrior socks

Funky Socks Friday is a new gimmick I have on my Facebook page. A friend of mine, Jason Shadowen, started the movement. It's kinda like Nerd Shirt Thursday, but with socks. However, I'm running low and need to add to my supply.

What's your Friday tradition? Post here. Have a great weekend.

Wishes are for Aladdin, be your own Genie

Courtesy: Disney

By Kevin Hunsperger

@kevinhunsperger & @my123cents on Twitter
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Disclaimer: I'm not an expert or a guru at anything, just sharing some advice that's worked for me.

I think many times we all say we wish something could be better about our lives. I've done it a lot. But now instead of wishing for stuff or opportunities, I'm focusing more making those things happen. There's no lamp and there's no Genie. Change has to come from within.

From Gary Vee's Snapchat

There are two people who I credit with molding my new outlook. One is a really good friend of mine, the other I've never met. Gary Vaynerchuk, aka Gary Vee has become an inspiration in recent months. Follow him on social media, listen to his podcasts and watch his YouTube videos. 

His advice is simple and doesn't require paying for a subscription. One of his principles is content is king. He's the reason I've started a "blogging streak." I've already noticed a jump in page views compared to this time last year. I've stopped playing Words with Friends as much and listening to so many wrestling podcasts. Instead I'm doing the "hustle".  I'll admit my game needs more work, but I believe I'm getting there. My Snapchat stories are more meaningful and my posts on my Instagram pages and Twitter are evolving.

My buddy Tom

My other go-to guy in the world of social media, marketing and life in general is Tom Harness. I've blogged about him before, but he's one of the most uplifting and positive people I've ever met. He actually hooked me onto Gary Vee. I firmly believe if you want to succeed at anything, you have to surround yourself if like-minded people. Tom's drive and hunger for success are infectious. The Craftbeericans all started with a conversation amongst friends and within a few days we had a name, logo and social media presence thanks to Tom's determination.

My first marathon 

We're not guaranteed tomorrow, but remember finding success is a like a marathon, which reminds me of my next point. When I ran my first (and so far only) marathon in October, I didn't "wish" I could do it. I trained hard for it. I missed social events to go running. I woke up early for training sessions. I changed my eating habits. Twenty-five years ago when I earned the rank of Eagle Scout, instead of wishing for the success I worked my butt off earning merit badges and completing a service project. I'm going to apply those same principles to making My 1-2-3 Cents a successful endeavor. 

This is the CliffsNotes version of all the thoughts going through my head. If you don't like your situation there is always something you can do to improve it. Even when it seems like there's not, you can. Make sacrifices and changes. But you have to WANT the change and not wish for it.

I will still wish for a pool on hot summer days, but now I'm going to work even harder on making things happen. Maybe in the not-so-distant future I'll be blogging and podcasting poolside.